sex toy party invitation
2005-02-17
c. called last night. i must say i was surprised. i was in bed, finishing an entry on my iblog. the phone rings. i know it's her from her ringtone. so she wanted to say she was sitting there reading my poems. she found it odd that some of them are from a woman's point of view. she was wondering if i hadn't told her something about myself (ie, i'm gay). after an initial shock and the thought to say i'd prove it to her if she came over, i explained that a college writing prof pushed us to write as others. he would say no reader wants to read the same people all the times. you need to be able to be other people, create other people. so boys write as girls, girls as boys. i found the technique helpful with some subjects. plus chick digged the "sensitive" boy. maybe that's what she did last night. who knows? she liked this threesome poem i wrote also. she said she was also making some notes. she then reminded (actually she never told me in the first place) party on sunday. she's having another sex toy party. now the last one was a "no penis" affair. but apparently enough boys complained that this one is coed. what do you bring to something like that? wine? beer? she said bring a friend. i got no one. stag it is. sigh. i don't know if i'm ready for this. a whole party full of people i don't know. i'm not very god with strangers in large numbers, and with the way my mind is working these days, i don't know what to do. i was thinking i might have blonde call me like two hours into the party and give me a way out if i need it. lame but it works. i might not be drowning by then. well, i've got a few days to think it over. oh, just when the conversaton was about to start, c. starts talking to someone. i thought it was her boyfriend, but she says it's the plumber. now it's 10pm. i question that, and she says something like "don't you know my life?" i guess that supposed to refer to the fact that she has too little time, and that this was the only time for him to come by. still, weird. she rang off saying someting about emailing tomorrow. i'll believe it when i see it.on another note, i wonder if i'm being a good friend. i feel like maybe i shold be more out there, but i don't also feel ready. my emotional skin is too thin. even for hanging out with friends. but i fear i might be losing them if i don't try harder. and how do you meet people without being out there? not that i'm dying to do that, but i know it would make some people in my life happy.
ok, i need another cup of coffee and to do some bill paying. : ) oh, lordy, my credit caard is heavy. but at least my ipod cash is growing. i'm nearly halfway there. i'm proud that i'm not charging it.
more later in the day. cheers to any who read this.
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Reading:
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