i've been sitting her for an hour. can't shake panther from my head. don't want to discuss it but it hurts.

and i feel...i don't know...left adrift. i guess. i haven't heard from yogagirl in weeks. i've stopped emailing her or tagging her with other people. i know she's pregnant and new husbanded. sigh. yeah no time for me. where's l.bug? i haven't heard anything from her in a long while. i know she's had a b-day last week; she got my card. but nothing in days. c. hasn't emailed or called since sex toy party. i sent her a few emails but no reply. feels like i was only good for the party, it's order form, and nothing else.

sigh

whining...and more whining...

seems like it's the only thing i excel at anymore.

.....